#1 - Public speaker
First, right now, visualise. Just close your eyes and see yourself being a public speaker.
That is a requirement. If you want to just speak and not think about stuttering you want to see yourself as a public speaker. And if you go thinking, "Oh, public speaker, the huge audience. But I don't have the audience! I don't have the stage!" Well, not true. Because these days you're just a click away from getting on stage and having an audience.
For example, you can join the Free From Stutter Facebook group. That is the audience, you just go live, and you're on stage. It can be a long presentation or it can be a very short introduction - just saying your name, wishing a good day to everyone. That is your public speaking experience.
And if you go thinking, "Yeah, but..." Go deeper into this "yeah, but..."
What is stopping you from doing that?
And if you go deeper, if you try doing that, you realize that this experience and doing that consistently - that is something that actually brings that mindset shift.
You see, the mindset shift doesn't happen when you're sitting on the couch watching videos. It happens only through action, and not just any action, but the action that feels like a big challenge. Getting on stage and speaking - that's one of the biggest challenges for us. That's the moment where you're exposing yourself, you're getting vulnerable, you're not hiding, you're not trying to escape.
That's the moment when you can learn to be truly present and to connect. And ironically, once you start doing that, you realise that maybe that's the easiest of all speaking interactions. Because in fact, you're in total control of what's going on at that moment. You choose, you decide, and you set the terms for how you speak at that moment.
This privately, secretly, escaping, hiding, avoiding, adapting, managing (call it whatever) - this is not working because when it comes to public speaking the keyword is not "speaking." The keyword is "public." You want to open up so that you feel truly that there is nothing to hide.